6/22/15 10:30 am
kate: Aang from behind, looking at a starry night. (AtLA: Aang meditating)
[personal profile] kate
My day yesterday started with my second-oldest brother texting me and my two sisters about Dad. He's been gone for 11 years now, and I still miss him like an ache. All four of us texted back and forth for about half an hour before my brother had to go back to work.

I spared half a thought for my oldest brother, who was somewhat estranged from us, and wished we could've included him.

This morning I got a call from my oldest sister. My oldest brother died in his sleep last night. He was just about to turn 60 (next week). I don't even know what to say. I'm in shock, a little, but I have no information so the only thing I can do is wait. I'll keep working until I get more information about the services, etc., and then I'll fly home, I guess.

It hasn't really hit me too hard yet. I think I'll probably leave work a little early today, but more because I'm tired than anything. I don't expect for this to really hit me until the services, when I will see his wife (the reason for the estrangement) and his six kids and their families.

He's fifteen years older than me, so we were never really that close, though I spent one summer with him and his wife, babysitting/helping/whatever with his two oldest (when there were only two). His wife didn't like me. She didn't like any of us. I'm sure she'll be glad to be rid of us forever.

So, this is it. My first sibling dying. To tell you the truth, I kind of expected it to be my older sister, who smokes like a chimney. And my second-oldest brother smokes like a chimney and drinks like a fish. My oldest brother quit drinking and smoking. Makes me want to take up some bad habits.

Still not really up for answering comments (thank you all for hanging in there with me, I'm sorry I've been such a lousy dreamwidth-mate lately), but thanks, as always, for all your love and encouragement. You guys are the best.
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kate: Kate Winslet is wryly amused (Default)


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