Fandom Snowflake Challenge - Day 8

[kate]

The Fandom Snowflake Challenge
Day 8: In your own space, talk about a talent (or talents) you have. Everyone's got something they're good at. Leave a comment in this post saying you did it. Include a link to your post if you feel comfortable doing so.

So I'm embarrassed to ask for things, and I'm while I'm not embarrassed about my talents, I'm embarrassed to talk about them out loud. One of my cardinal rules is that if you have talent you don't have to toot your own horn, someone else will do it for you.

I'm trying to get over that because a) it's not always (or even normally) true and b) it's one of the ways that women remain silent about their talents and contributions and I think it can lead to imposter's syndrome, and that's no good for anybody.

1. I'm good with words. I write okay, but I'm pretty good at editing/betaing. I'm better with the in close stuff (grammar, spelling, punctuation, word choice, sentence/para structure and rhythm/voice as well as characterization and plot logic) than the wider stuff (structure of the piece as a whole, pacing in an overall work (I'm good within smaller sections)) and I do better on shorter works because I can do them all in one go (and the bigger stuff is small enough that I'm good at it too)...

Okay, so, there, see that? The 'I can't possibly rec myself without caveats'? THAT ANNOYS ME. I hate that I can't possibly just say, "I AM A GOOD BETA" without either adding in that only in specific ways, not all around or I can't even say "I AM A GOOD WRITER" but only "I am an okay writer." I hate it. It makes me angry that this is how I feel I have to represent myself, like I can't shine. I'm going to try to fix that on the next things.

2. I am good at music. This one, there is no caveat on (and wouldn't be even if I hadn't just given myself that lecture). When I was in shape, I was probably in the top 1,000 clarinetists in the world (and would be again, if I could get back in shape - but I don't really think I ever will). I have a good grasp of theory and composition and decent enough of history, and I would not feel out of place (nor be underqualified) as a clarinet/theory teacher at most American universities.

3. I am good at organization. I am not OTT (I like my house/workdesk tidy but not neat, if you know what I mean), but I can organize almost anything (and do on a regular basis). I love taking a whole bunch of stuff and making it into a list or spreadsheet, or finding ways to deal with systems/processes to make them more efficient.

4. I am a good teacher. A great one, if it's something I'm good at. My memories of teaching my clarinet students will always be some of the most heartwarming of my life. I think about going back to teaching a lot, but I don't really want to teach music, and one of the problems with having as many music degrees as I do is that they won't let you teach anything else.

5. I'm a good baker. I used to be terrible in the kitchen (and I'm still not a cook by any means, though I have a few dishes I can make) but I'm a damn fine baker, and I have the desire to play with baking recipes to make them right, and I love to do it.

There are actually other things I really like about myself, but I think this is enough for now. :D

Comments

[elmyraemilie]

And again with the things in common! I used to play the clarinet (not by any means well, mind you) but I really did enjoy making music. And I heart Excel in a big way. No large project is without its spreadsheet.

You're right about not being able to say, "I am good at X." I think we're taught not to brag, and that translates somehow into not being able to acknowledge what we do well, as though it was some kind of fault to do so.

[grammarwoman]

Sweetheart, you are not a good beta, you are a SPECTACULAR beta. You burnish, polish, and generally help release the diamonds trapped in the metaphorical coals. *HUGS*

I wish I could import you for #3, for my house is drowning in crap, and I feel like I'm never making any progress in conquering it. *sigh*

[florahart]

because a) it's not always (or even normally) true and b) it's one of the ways that women remain silent about their talents and contributions and I think it can lead to imposter's syndrome, and that's no good for anybody.

So much this.

I have determined that this year my list of shit-what-I-did for my annual review process is going to be long and not minimizing of anything like it usually is. I have been a total rockstar this year, and I should say so, damn it.

[kate]

I saw that on your post! You know, I swear, a ridiculously high proportion of folks I know have played clarinet. You'd think it'd be a wide range of instruments, but I would say if someone plays an instrument and knows me, it's about a 50% chance it's clarinet.

Yes - you've totally nailed it. It's considered impolite to brag - but it seems (personal experience only here) that what "brag" means is different for men and women.

[kate]

<333 I'm glad you think so, lovely. I do enjoy betaing, I love exactly that, polishing something up until it shines.

Oh, hon. The only advice I can give you on the house front is to make regular trips to goodwill! Anything I haven't touched in six months, I take to goodwill (but make it years, if that suits you better). Keeping the stuff down makes organizing it easier. I'm better with data and processes, though. My house is okay, but my workspace is impeccable. :D

[kate]

Good for you, bb! We are awesome, dammit, and it does more harm than good to hide that light under a bushel. You are a rock star. <3

[elmyraemilie]

You're right about that, as far as the general view of our society goes. Just as women get "upset" where men get "angry," women "brag" where men "know their strengths."

[silverraven]

I'm embarrassed by it too, and I get exactly what you're saying, so yay on you for completing this challenge. :D

And you are a GREAT teacher and a GREAT beta and a GREAT writer.

I love baking too! Although my favorite part will probably always be the eating that follows, lol.

[kate]

<3333333333333333333333333333333

Yeah, that's my favorite part of baking too (and my office's). :D

[wintercreek]

You are a fantastic beta and a wonderful writer, things that do not necessarily go hand-in-hand and are thus more impressive because you have both skills. Just sayin'. <3

[kate]

Yes, this exactly. Double standards, grrrrrr.

[kate]

♥

[psyche29]

It is so, so hard to overcome that little voice telling you to stop bragging. I fight it all the time, personally. There are a few things I really like about myself, but too many times have been told, "Is your arm tired from patting yourself on the back?" It doesn't matter that it was jokingly said, there must be some kernel of truth to it for the person to have said it, but why does it have to be a bad thing to be proud of what I can do?

I think that you are excellent at all those things. Numbers 1 and 3 actually combine for me; my resume is kickass because of you. ♥