on 1/24/16 09:24 pm (UTC)
kate: Kate Winslet is wryly amused (Default)
Posted by [personal profile] kate
I'm sorry, but that is mincing words. It's fine, assuming that you really don't think people with triggers are idiots (and your use of "we" makes me think you are one of them, in which case, I have no more comment - as a person with triggers, you're welcome to speak of your own group in your own way).

I did want to point it out, though, because it is something I try very hard to avoid myself, and had to choose my words carefully in the post and my responses. Because I believe authors have the right to write and tag as they like, and I still would like to protect people with triggers, I'd love for it to be as simple as just "people with triggers should vet every single story through someone else" but honestly, that just doesn't seem reasonable to me.

It's too much like my gluten allergy where I weigh the consequences of something that might have gluten, whether or not asking will actually get me an accurate answer (lots of chefs don't KNOW what foods contain gluten besides wheat), and whether or not what I'm about to eat might be worth the possibility that I could be miserable for a few hours or days. Sometimes I get sick of having to go through the whole rigamarole and I just say "fuck it" and eat the thing. And sometimes I get lucky, sometimes not. This feels very much like that to me, and let me tell you, when I find extremely conscientious places that include detailed gluten information on their menus, it is a huge relief and makes me so happy. I try to be that gluten free menu - and I try not to be judgmental about folks who are sick of asking their friends to vet every single story for them. My point was simply to point out that it's not idiocy - it's simple human frustration and desire. I want to avoid putting judgments on it, especially because I don't have triggers so I'm not in a position to judge.

And thank you - I agree that your comment was not disrespectful overall or calling for mean answers from authors. I tried to recognize that in my first part of the original comment, and apologies if that didn't come across.
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kate: Kate Winslet is wryly amused (Default)


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